By GRETCHEN AMMERMAN/Oregon Coast TODAY
Technology. Where would we be if it weren’t for a few mad scientists along the way?
We certainly wouldn’t have the benefit of such life saving gadgets as the Candy Crush app or on-line Bingo, that’s for sure.
Trying to cook up some family friendly entertainment for the summer, local mad scientist Commander Salamander is hard at work creating all the tools he will need to provide the thrills and chills to be had at Commander Salamander’s Super Circus Sideshow. A one-of-a-kind experience that is just as enjoyable for adults, the show features thrilling circus acts and curious creatures.
“I’m coming to you live, direct from my lab in Oysterville,” the Commander said. “I just put the finishing touches on my newest invention, the electric supercharged hair straightener, seat warmer and soup cooker. You just sit in the chair, turn a knob and it will not only cook your soup, but if you have curly hair, it will take care of that, too. I’ll be selecting a lucky victim, sorry, I meant to say a volunteer, from the audience at each show to try it out.”
Beginning Friday, July 21, Commander Salamander, along with his lovely assistant and wife, Dixie Delish, will present three shows a day, most Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays through Aug. 28.
The circus “tent” is the Primaltones Community Venue in Newport’s Aquarium Village, where the show has performed in previous summers.
By the way, don’t let the word “circus” in the name fool you.
“I don’t make balloon animals, I’m not a clown and I’m not a juggler,” the Commander said. “What we provide are more classic sideshow acts that you won’t see anywhere else here at the coast, like sword swallowing, knife throwing and bull-whip cracking. Our act hearkens back to a different type of traditional entertainment, but is still very family friendly.”
The colorful “cast” includes Mephisto the Magnificent.
“He’s our fire guy,” the Commander said. “He drinks gasoline like you and I would drink ice tea. We are also incredibly lucky to have scored our world champion sword swallower again. He will swallow swords, sabers and bayonets, down the hatch without a scratch — all the way down to the bottom of his appetite.”
And a supercharged feast for the eyes will come from above.
“We’ll have a visit from Buttercup Firefly,” the Commander said. “She will be doing the dance of the electric rainbow butterfly.”
Another favorite performer in the show is a pup that’s small in size but huge in talent.
“We will have a few acts featuring Squid Dog No Pants,” the Commander said. “He’s the world’s only performing squid dog.”
The great photo ops are a big draw of the show.
“We definitely have a local following, kids will come on their birthday and we’ll put them in the show and make a big deal about it.”
The venue will have snacks, pizza, ice cream, microbrews and even face painting available before and after each show.
“We’ll also have a merchandise table,” the Commander said. “That way people can bring home some oyster art magic. Unfortunately I’m still waiting for the patent to clear on my supercharged seat, so those won’t be for sale … yet.”
And of course, there’s the curiosities.
“We found a fascinating creature that I’m pretty sure is the fabled Yaquina Bay mermaid,” the Commander said. “It looks to be part otter and part human. Other creatures may show up in the act, but you have to show up to find out.”
- Commander Salamander’s Super Circus Sideshow will happen at noon, 2 p.m. and 4 p.m. July 21-23, July 28-30, Aug. 4-6, and Aug. 25-27.
- Tickets are $12 for adults and $7 for kids age 12 and younger.
- Primaltones Community Venue is located at 2925 S.E. FerrySlip Road, Newport. For more information, go to www.americanamayhem.com.
